Interview with Deshawn Keiner from NaCaroInc.

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Deshawn is no ordinary woman. Her childhood was not easy. Facing hardship and abuse. Growing up with little love. You could understand why anyone would want to drown their sorrows and numb themselves to the world. It’s not like there aren’t a number of valid reasons.

Yet you won’t get those kinds of thoughts or words from Deshawn. What you will receive is encouragement. She knows the depths of despair. Waking up and reaching for her cure was a daily habit. Read her post A Cocaine Addicts Morning.

She has the capacity to empathise with you when you’re not on top of it. She won’t be at your pity party. But she will be by your side showing you how you can come back from anything. How you’re valued, regardless of what you have been through.

She will not stand for you sinking. She won’t hear any of that. Her message is clear. No matter what you have done, how you previously behaved you can choose the life you want to live.

She doesn’t give it to you sugar coated. You want raw honesty. Well, you’ve come to the right place. Sorting your life out and living a drug-free existence is not easy. But she will always tell you you’re worth it. You deserve it. Read, 5 ways to achieve peace in your life. Her tried methods for keeping her balance.

I can’t wait for you read the interview I have had with Deshawn from NaCaroInc.

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He says beer, she says shoes. The compromise in a relationship.

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The word compromise gets tossed around lightly. Talked about as if it’s the easiest thing in the world to come to terms with.

Having a standard and lowering it to meet in the middle. These discussions are about adjusting your expectations.

At times theory and reality walk parallel to one another. It’s tough work negotiating. Looking for a win-win situation.

Disagreeing is essential to your own well-being. Especially if you won’t be able to live with the terms discussed. Regardless of how uncomfortable sharing this information can be.

New beginnings.

A recently committed couple discuss future plans. Mortgage, marriage and children. Taking the relationship to the next level. There’s enthusiasm being caught up in these talks. At the time it sounds good and feels right.

Hours after the discussion irritation starts to build. One party isn’t sure anymore. It has begun to feel more like an obligation rather than embracing what seemed like logical steps forward.

It’s obvious that’s what partners do. Yet internally there’s an uneasy feeling rising within, demanding attention. Now these talks feel rushed. Maybe it’s was too soon to be making such plans.

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How to Pitch A Strong Opinion Without Losing the Message.

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Have you ever listened to a speaker deliver a message where you hold onto their every word? It’s a spectacular scene to behold. Its that strong opinion that sparked passion.

Every part of their voice and gestures show commitment to the subject. Creating discussions where everyone’s hooked. There are many for and against. The whole group are under no illusion, it’s the subject that’s under attack. Disagreement stirs the conversation.

The message is lost when: –

It becomes personal.
It’s about one person’s point of view. Every other opinion is dismissed.
Individuals are being talked over.
The main objective is to win an argument rather than debate it.

A crowd will leave the talk with what stood out the most. The subject is no longer the talking point. The behaviour has people shaking their heads in dismay.

Problems arise when one falls deaf to views that aren’t in line with their own. Behaving as if their beliefs are the only ones that matter.

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Forgiving is Breaking Free from the Bondage Others Created.

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Forgive and forget. Don’t you find it odd, these two words are combined to form a sentence? Life has delivered hardship. An experience forever imprinted in your memory banks. You may become forgiving but you will never forget.

Let’s face it, forgiving others is a tough process. Although the alternative leaves you condemned to replay the torture over in your mind.

Forgiving others is tough. The alternative leaves you condemned to replay the torture over & over. @thedigger0 Share on X

You don’t just wake up one morning reading something on the internet and start forgiving. There’s countless steps one must travel through mentally to let go of the past.

Many an evil have others had to endure as a human[s] unleashes their will over another. Premeditated immoralities, errors in judgement and accidents impact others. Taking years to recover.

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Positive and Negative Reinforcement Create Patterned Behaviour.

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Have you ever met someone who tells a story, yet you feel they are not sharing the truth? It makes you feel a little cheated. Disappointed in them. If they’ve fibbed once you may wonder how many others times they’ve done the same thing. Lying is a learned patterned behaviour.

It differs from those who embellish their version of events. Wanting to spice up their tales keeping it interesting for the audience.

A perpetual liar requires the memory of an elephant. Having to remain alert at all times. Constantly watching what is flowing from their mouth.

One lie leads to another. If they don’t remain on top of it, they will be found out. Losing all creditability.

The process of patterned behaviour.

Say for instance, a parent is in the habit of bullying their child. The young person had to think on their toes otherwise they would be unfairly punished.

After a while the child masters the skill of lying. Sneaky and sly are a part of their forte. Becoming an expert at telling people what they want to hear.

It’s not a natural instinct. It became a part of a survival process the child had to inhabit to get around a powerful adult.

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Are You Avoiding Your Situation With Anti-Depressants?

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Life is a mixed bag of routines and unexpected surprises. There are times where every breath is a joy. We’re on top of the world, feeling grateful for who we are.

Then the unforeseen occurs throwing us into shock. Unbalancing our lives. Questioning our whole existence. The aftermath of such an event can send us plummeting into depression at a fast rate.

Doctors refer to this as Situational Depression. Also known as a condition called Adjustment Disorder. A traumatic event/s changes our circumstances. Our normal routines have been zapped with an upheaval.

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What a Tandem Sky Dive Taught Me About The Fear Factor.

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Facing a fear factor one step at a time, takes us to the cross roads of change and calculated risk. Opening up opportunity to step outside of our comfort zones.

Our confidence grows when we break through personal barriers. Experiences of this nature send us on emotional journeys. Acquainting ourselves with these sensations improves our awareness of how we operate internally.

I had arranged a tandem sky dive. The date was set. The three week countdown was on.

I was curious about how I managed challenging situations. My motivation was to familiarise myself with my own fear factors.

Every time I thought about the pending jump I would be bombarded with competing sensations.

Negotiating the Fear Factor.

My mind presented many excuses as to why I did not have to do such a silly thing like jump out of a plane. What did I have to prove to myself? I had done it once before, doing it again was pointless.

These questions would automatically send me to another stage of thinking.

The Fear Factor Thrill.

I felt brave challenging myself. I knew I was scared that feeling is never confusing. I was walking towards a fear factor that would make my heart race.

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Vipassana Meditation – There Is No Escaping Yourself.

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I didn’t know what I was searching for. Full of life, with no direction. Trying one experience after another. To land smack bang in the middle of a 10 day retreat called Vipassana Meditation.

Before embarking on this adventure, I read all the instructions of the course. One would have thought I had some idea of what I was installed for. Little was I to know how much of an impact this would have on me long into the future.

Would you believe it, if I said I had found the biggest rush of a life time? The Vipassana Meditation course would suit both the dare devil and the book worm?

We all know the adventurous type who jumps from a plane, scales walls, takes a leap of faith with a rope wrapped around their ankles and then jumps. They do whatever it takes to get their adrenaline running through their veins. Some of the risks are life threatening. One wrong calculation and death could be at their door step.

Then there are those who love to get lost in a good book. Enjoying page after page of romance, horror, thrillers or whatever takes their mind on a ride. Reading about life’s adventures through the eyes of a writer.

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How Do You Compartmentalise Your Life?

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Do you think the internet has reduced our concentration spans? It deliver’s many forms of stimulation. Jumping from one site to another. We don’t keep our attention in one place for too long. Yet there are times when we compartmentalise each and every task. Concentrating; not allowing anything to interrupt us until the job is done.

Distractions are everywhere. With our busy schedules we must exercise discipline over the mind.

Our lives revolve around two main environments. Home and school or how we earn a living. Yet it is far more complex. When we divide our time into compartments we get a better look at all the responsibilities.

Home: Relaxation, Entertainment, Rent or Mortgage, Bills, Repairs, Meals, Cleaning, Garden and/or Pool Maintenance

Family: Mother, Father, Siblings, Children, Partner, Friends, Expectations, Customs and Rituals, Celebrations

Work: Relationships, Deadlines, Pressures, Earnings, Meetings, Events

Activities: Expenses, Pleasures, Activity (E.g. Fishing or Scrapbooking)

This can be divided into smaller components.

Sibling: School, Homework, Friends, Activities, Illness, Appointments, Hobbies, Invitations.

Throughout the day we have various duties and responsibilities to attend to. Our attention is determined by how we have arranged our life. Each area gives us joy, pleasure, pressures, burdens and unhappiness.

Maintaining a single-mindedness becomes difficult when we are faced with a number of problems in different areas of our daily lives.

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It’s Time To Examine Ourselves When We React Whilst Communicating.

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It’s time to examine your emotions if you are feeling like this.

Creative people work towards having their master pieces viewed by an audience. With the intention of being informative or thought provoking. Generating emotions such as passion, anger, happiness and sadness or even sparking a fire. They want us to react. You may appreciate their work. It may bring up a fond or horrid memory from the past. If an artist has stirred something within you they get to take a bow.

Should we hold the same gratitude toward people who offend, insult or make us defensive? It’s not art when an individual rouses such deep feelings within us. However we could be thanking them in the long run for pointing out an area in ourselves that requires examination.

Your worst enemy cannot harm you as much as your own unguarded thoughts. – Buddha

As humans we react so fast. One minute we are sitting around having a casual conversation, the next, voices are raised and a disagreement has erupted. When communication creates such disturbances, we can see this as an opportunity for growth.

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