It’s that time of the year again. Chocolate treats are everywhere. Retail shops start pushing Easter not long after the Christmas decorations come down.
Lucky we know a little about the psychology of marketing. Otherwise we may suspect that Cadbury do a secret deal with children.
All the pretty coloured wrappers shining and teasing the kids. Shopping is hard enough without the Easter promotion. The youngsters eyes light up when they see the gold bunny or their favourite characters plastered all over the chocolate treats.
Babies reaching out from the trolley in an attempt to grab at the sparkling colours. Three year olds put on their thinking caps. Wondering how they’re going to get their mommy to buy them chocolates. The five year old coming straight out with it. Asking for sugar treats. Not accepting no as an answer.
Advanced communication skills.
The child negotiator will use every possible communication tactic to get their hands on a chocolate. It begins with a whine. Then moves to a constant natter about chocolate treats. They know how to wear adults down.
When all else fails the tears begin. As though you’re depriving them of their entitlement. Tantrums have even been known around this part of the year. All to do with chocolate treats.
Crazy child comedian.
Loaded with sugar the act begins. Especially when there’s a group of little people around, eating chocolate treats together. One dances around, the others giggle, spurring the comedian on. It’s like adults don’t understand this type of silly.
Good Grandparents gone bad.
They’re your parents. You bring up your kids similar to the way you were bought up. They gave you great life lessons.
As they arrive at your house, you see the little ones running for the door. Looking forward to greeting some of their most loved people in their world. You enjoy seeing the whole family together.
Yet over Easter the grandparents are loaded with chocolate treats. You see the bags of sugar being bought in from the car.
You’re parents are no longer preaching rotting teeth, bad diet or the sugar monsters. No it seems like all that parenting they instilled in you has disappeared.
You’re tempted to revert back to your child hood ways. Chucking a tantrum about all the chocolate treats they’re supplying your children. You’ve named the Grandparents sugar peddlers.
Now they’re encouraging your parenting to go sideways. You can hear it now, ‘Oh its Easter’ or ‘just this once’.
Parents come running.
The high pitched squeal. Parents racing to a child’s side wondering with fear if they have to call an ambulance. Tear smeared faces, pointed fingers and the accusation ‘He/she took my chocolates.’
The chocolate hostage.
Your child watches you like a hawk when you have their chocolate treats. You’re no longer a valued family member but the chocolate demon. Keeping them away from their most valued possession.
Mum’s put chocolate treats out of reach of their children.
Morning arrives and your child’s eyes flick open from their slumber. They instantly remember there are chocolate treats in the house.
They quietly (never are they quiet) tip toe past your room, down the hall straight into the kitchen. Not wanting to disturb you from sleep. They’re on a sugar mission.
The chocolates are at the top of the cupboard. Little ones assess the situation. Desperate to find solutions. They’re single minded and focused. Pushing chairs, boxes or anything that will help them reach their target.
The eager egg hunter. 
Concentration is strong. Movement is fast. There is no piece of grass unchecked. No hidey hole undiscovered. The chocolate hunter does not take this task on lightly. Carrying their basket, hoping to fill it to the brim. This keeps them busy. Running around urgently wanting to collect as much chocolate as they can.
The ‘seek and eat’ mission.
Waiting patiently for the parents to leave the chocolate vicinity. They have one aim on their mind. To get those chocolates, to escape without detection and eat treats without bother. These tactics would go unnoticed to parents if it were not for the food ring. That give away.
Child on the ‘seek and eat’ mission lack skills in hiding the evidence. Chocolate melted all over their face. Future Spy or Terrorist is left wondering how enemy parent is onto them. It reiterates that mothers have eyes in the back of their heads.
The Parent Thief.
No wonder there’s an Easter time division between children and parents. Adults helping themselves to chocolate that are not rightly theirs for the taking.
Underestimating how observant their little people are. Memorising and counting all their chocolate treasures. Family members looked upon as the power brokers. Holding all the ingredients to child’s happiness.
A clause in the calorie count.
Alert to all parents out there. A notice just arrived from the Easter Bunny committee. If the kids don’t see you eating their chocolate, it’s calorie free. It’s hard to believe. But you do have a responsibility to these young people to limit their chocolate intake. It’s an incentive to help finish this part of the year on a good note.
The Parent Bribe.
Easter is a time where kids want chocolate for breakfast, lunch and dinner.
Bribe them. Stop over thinking this. Save yourselves.
Around Easter it’s every adult and child for themselves. These are not your normal days. Chocolate lingers in your youngsters mind. They may be side tracked for a short time. But you know all too well it won’t be long before they come up with another way of asking for their chocolate treats.
Question: ‘Mum can I have some chocolate?’
Response: ‘Is your room clean?’
Action: Before you know it their bedroom has no signs of play. Every toy soldier and Barbie are pushed under the bed or thrown into the wardrobe. At least you can see the floor.
Question: ‘Can I please have some chocolate?’
Response: ‘Have a piece of fruit first and I will let you pick a chocolate.’
Action: There may be some initial disapproval about the fruit. Although it will be gobbled down pretty fast. At a speed you have never seen you kids eat fruit. Incentives are motivating for us all.
Demand: ‘You won’t get any chocolate tomorrow if you don’t brush your teeth.’
Action: Moments later they’re smiling and proving their breath is fresh. It’s important to go to bed knowing tomorrows chocolate treats are organised.
There is no angle that these beautiful little negotiators won’t try, when it comes to Easter treats.
Easter is the time of year where parenting skills will be pushed to the maximum. Be prepared. Arm yourself. Have diversion back up plans. Do what you can so Easter treats and sugar highs are manageable, if that’s at all possible. This time of year is Chocolate warfare. Parents around the world, good luck, Easter is on its way.
Don’t forget to share this with other parents who may thank you later for the tips.